HA! Bennifer II IS owned by Starbucks!!!

As I posted earlier this month, there is a strange connection between Bennifer II and Starbucks. Looks like the MSM is picking up on their continual trips to the coffee chain. Check out the Lloyd Grove piece questioning their motives.

A Lowdown spy reports that the caffeinated couple has snagged an exclusive "seven-figure" contract with Starbucks Coffee Co. to drink, be photographed with and generally promote the popular java around the country.
"It's a relatively new deal," says the insider. "And considering how often they are photographed with the stuff, I'd say they're working pretty hard."

full article

Ben's reps deny the claims, and Jen Garner's peeps haven't responded, but I think there will be more investigations.

Welcome to a whole new world of product placement, folks.

Cudos to CityRag for being on the same page too!!

Scientology Crop Circles in New Mexico

L. Ron Hubbard strikes again, attempting to create a pseudo-religious presence. The Washington Post reports about strange crop circles in New Mexico that mark the spot of a secret Scientology bunker/tunnel/cult place.

The church tried to persuade station KRQE not to air its report last week about the aerial signposts marking a Scientology compound that includes a huge vault "built into a mountainside," the station said on its Web site. The tunnel was constructed to protect the works of L. Ron Hubbard, the late science-fiction writer who founded the church in the 1950s.

The archiving project, which the church has acknowledged, includes engraving Hubbard's writings on stainless steel tablets and encasing them in titanium capsules.

full article

Perhaps it will also be the birth place of little William Oscar?

Scientology Preys On Small Children

Via CityRag

Tonight - SOUTHPARK takes on Scientology: [via BoingBoing]

Wednesday's edition of South Park tackles Scientology, in the typically oblique fashion fans of the show know and dig. But what's particularly interesting about the episode titled "Trapped in the Closet" is that show producers tapped Mark Ebner for script consultation. The Hollywood journo and celebrity-dirt-digger wrote this legendary Spy magazine article on Scientology from 1996...

The Supermarket Conspiracy

Much like what I believe to be a profitable partnership between Starbucks and certain caffene guzzling celebrities, I'm thinking the same is true with supermarkets & celebs.

Earlier this summer we endured a rash images capturing starlets pushing carts of groceries. (mainly Jessica Alba - right before she became the new media IT girl, and Ben/Jen before they were purchased by Starbucks) And now we have Paris (who is clearly at Smart & Final) heaving gigantic boxes of brand-name snack food into her cart.

You need to understand this. Paris Hilton would only do her own grocery shopping IF:
1. she was stoned
2. she was wasted
3. she was with her boyfriend who was stoned/wasted and she wanted to make him happy
4. she needs a good photo op of her being a "real" person to smooth over an earlier bad press moment (i.e. crashing her Bentley)
5. she is getting back at someone by seeming domestic - or happy - or domestically happy (i.e. Nicole Richie)
6. General Mills & Kraft's PR Department called her up and promised $$$ if she would just go to the store and look really excited about buying cereal.

I'm going with a combination of 6 + 4 + 3, but you can decide for yourself.

Here are pics of Brangelina shopping for food - just like the Ozzie & harriet couple they are about to convince the world they are.

Conspiracy: Food chains are getting a bad rap in sales because everyone is starving themselves. Food chains haven't yet tapped into the massive PR opps involving celebs at their stores. However, grocery stores are catching on (at least here in LA) and are tipping off the photogs to get in on the action. Plus, notice how their always filling their carts to the top with TONS of food? There's no "run in for a gallon of milk" pics - its buy buy buy and more more more.

Scientology Sitcom: That 70's Show

The 2 leads on That 70's Show are Scientologists: Danny Masterson & Laura Prepon

and now Isaac Hayes (who recently sang at the cult's conference in the UK) is set to guest star on the show.

Here is an excerpt from Isaac Hayes' website detailing his "charity" work...it has the same tone as Tom Cruise's:

Hayes is a tireless champion of human rights. Currently, he is the international
spokesman for the World Literacy Crusade, in which he encourages people to work and/or stay in school, and the Shepherd Foundation, a Harlem-based non-profit organization that researches alternative treatments for degenerative diseases.

Conspiracy: Scientologists stick together. In Hollywood, they take care of their own, which is why it is so tempting to join them if you're pursuing the entertainment business. You have to be careful that they don't draw you in. That 70's show is proof of that point. I predict Katie Holmes will make a guest appearance at some point. Even though she says she's giving up acting to be a stay at home mom.

The Top 26 Reasons the French Are Rioting

Very Funny. From CRACKED.Com

26. Smoking banned in hospital operating-rooms
25. Domestic cats being attacked by serial skunk rapist
24. Population of fake Louis Vuitton bags reaching epidemic proportions
23. Matchpoint, Woody Allen's latest film, getting decent advanced buzz in America
22. Jerry Lewis announced two-month temporary retirement
21. Snooty Index at all-time high
20. Bill O'Reilly doesn't have enough reasons to bitch about them
19. Rodney Roi beat up by le police
18. French's Mustard tarnishing culinary reputation
17. European Union declares deodorant mandatory
16. 2006 model bidet delayed
15. Decades-old Truffaut/Godart debate finally reaches breaking point
14. Gerard Depardieu told them to
13. Can smell England from other end of chunnel
12. Found out escargot is actually snails
11. Heard a Jew got promoted at work
10. Hike in beret tax
9. All Frenchmen finally out of the closet
8. Pencil-thin-mustache factory outsourced to India
7. Upset to be seen along with London and school children's underpants
6. Neckerchiefs and striped shirts out of stock at Le Gap
5. Demanding royalties on Napoleon Dynamite
4. Sexual frustration caused by adorable pixie Audrey Tautou
3. La deluge (apres mois)
2. An American in Paris officially renamed A Freedom Lover in a Place Where They Hate Freedom
1. Because the French are assholes

By Matt Tobey, Geoff Wolinetz and Josh Abraham

Michael Jackson: Going Going Gone

Jacko is closing up shop folks. Here's the latest from FOX News:

Michael Jackson's world is one of constant upheaval. But the latest news from Jackson is more disturbing than usual.

Sources tell me the disloyal, capricious ex-King of Pop has fired both of his closest confidantes.

More headaches: His Web site, http://www.mjjsource.com/, which had been run by his brother Randy and former stylist Karen Faye, is gone as well, leaving subscribers and fan club members high and dry.

Now I'm told that Faye has been dismissed along with aide-de-camp/keeper of all secrets, Evvy Tavasci.

read the full report

Further Proof The Michael Jackson is Guilty

"He'll come back to visit, but not to stay, not to live," Joseph Jackson told The Associated Press in a recent interview.
Jackson said his son, who was acquitted in June of child molestation, has received lots of threats in the United States. The superstar now lives in Bahrain and his lawyers have said that he no longer considers his Neverland Ranch in California as his home.
"They didn't treat him right here. I know if I was him, I wouldn't come back," his father said.
full report

Conspiracy: The Jackson Camp worked out a deal - he'll leave the country if he's found innocent. Or, he was threatened to leave immediatly after the trial. Either way, good riddance Freak Show.

Star Jones Exposed

image via LAComfidential

Perez Hilton gushes about the National Enquirer's expose about the wicked Purple People Eater:

- She insists she didn't cheat when she quickly lost 150lbs and denies speculation she had gastric bypass surgery. Is smoking crack cheating?
- She hates dogs, even though she bought a pooch named Pinkie to win favor with pet-loving fans. Wonder who decided to name the dog "Pinkie," her or BGA [Big Gay Al]?
- One of Star's friends said: "She actually models herself on royalty - she wears a tiara whenever she can. Star loves being larger than life." Hey, with friends like that, you don't need enemies!

Conspiracy: Star Jones is her own conspiracy. She's not important enough to actually influence the world with alterior motives. Our biggest shame is actually paying attention to her and giving her press. She was way cooler with the extra pounds and a "be yourself attitude". She totally sold herself to the thin-is-in Hollywood scam and as she lost her pounds, she lost her personality. Ew.

Read a hilarious (real!) conversation with Star's agent at RadarOnline. Proof that the woman will literally do anything for money.

Another Saddam Lawyer Slain

No its not Hollywood news - (though I bet Spike Lee & Michael Spoore are salivating to re-cap the whole ordeal on film) but it is concerning:

Three gunmen in a speeding car killed a lawyer for a co-defendant in
Saddam Hussein's trial and wounded another Tuesday in Baghdad, a member of the defense team and police said. It was the second assassination of a Saddam defense team lawyer in less than a month.

...On Oct. 20, Saadoun al-Janabi, was abducted from his office by 10 masked gunmen, a day after he attended the first session of the trial, acting as the lawyer for co-defendant Awad al-Bandar.
Al-Janabi's body, with two bullet shots to the head, was found hours later on a sidewalk near Fardous Mosque in the eastern neighborhood of Ur in Baghdad, near the site of his office.

full report

Saddam has evil and turmoil surrounding him from every direction. Pay close attention to this case - it's bound to keep everyone on their toes from start to finish.

Tom Cruise Fires His Sister: Hires Better Scientologist Friendly PR Rep

Variety reports today that Tom Cruise has axed his Scientologist sister and has moved on to Paul Bloch from Rogers & Cowan.

Tom Cruise has hired veteran publicist and Rogers and Cowan co-chairman Paul Bloch to handle his publicity activities, including those for Cruise-Wagner Prods.

Paul Bloch is also John Travolta's publicist. Cruise's sister, Lee Anne DeVette will take over his charitable endeavors.

DeVette said: "I know how important Tom's charitable goals are to him, and I look forward to assisting in raising the profile of the good works that he does on behalf of children's health issues, mentoring, literacy and other social reforms, as well as the general betterment of the human condition."

I'm not really sure what to expect here. I imagine Paul Bloch will tell Tom to chill out already and just focus on making movies. Katie should avoid the Jen Garner / Brittany Spears approach to dragging her pregnancy all over the press. I bet we'll see a lot more charitable work from the couple a la John & Kelly.

Click here for freaky facts about Tom Cruise via the fabulous TomCruiseIsNuts.Com

Katie Holmes is Depressed

The depression is already setting in for Katie Holmes. Just a few months ago she was looking fab for all her 'outings' with Tom Cruise. Their latest soccer game tells a different story.
Don't tell me she didn't know there would be photographers - her hair is greasy and unbrushed. Her face looks pale.
I suspect this is the beginnings of what will be a constant bought of depression from Katie Holmes. She is a nice Catholic girl, who comes from a good mid-west family. This brain-washed, cult transition into a pregnant fake marriage would take its toll on anyone.

Starbucks Owns Ben Affleck & Jennifer Garner

Hot Mama Drama hit it right on the nose. There is a strange connection between Benifer #2 and Starbucks. The only photo ops that are ever available are when they're in front of and carrying Starbucks products.
I have it on good authority that Jen (who really is a nice gal) has also paid (out of her own pocket) to have the Starbucks truck come on to the Alias set, allowing free coffee drinks for all for several hours. Super nice, sure. But why??

Conspiracy: Starbucks has struck a deal between Ben & Jen and the press. All coffee outings are leaked to photogs and there is most likely some hefty compensation from the 'Bucks to the expecting couple. Stock options? Cash? Plus, how much are they being paid by the press for all these drama-free, friendly paparrazi sessions? It's not a coincidence folks. Its a smart business deal.
Its more Jen that is the poster woman for the coffee company than Ben. So what message is this sending to expectant mothers?? Go to Starbucks for your cravings...coffee is ok to drink when you're pregnant...

Prego women are a big demographic in America right now. Starbucks is smart to infuse themselves with the daily happenings of moms and moms to be.

It's All A Conspiracy

Your eyes are about to be opened. Do you think all the antics in Hollywood are just an accident?? They're not. Just take a minute to put it all into perspective, and you'll see the madness for what it really is...smoke in mirrors to make a select few people lots and lots and lots of money.
Just watch.