No One Will Pay For (fake) Pictures of Suri Cruise

From Fox News

If like everyone else you've been wondering what happened to Suri Cruise and why we've never seen a picture of her, here is part of the answer: No one wanted to pay for her.

According to my sources, a photo shoot of Suri was offered to Wire Image, the prestigious agency, for sale to the various celebrity magazines right after the little "Mission: Impossible"/"Dawson's Creek" tyke was born in silence to her unmarried movie star parents Tom Cruise and the dazed-looking Katie Holmes.

An auction was conducted, with People, Us Weekly, Star and the lesser names like In Touch all putting in their two cents.

The Cruise auction is said to have produced not more than a $3 million bid. At that point, the offer was rescinded. The mission was termed "impossible." No further word was heard from the Cruise camp.

Exactly who from Cruise's strange inner circle initiated the contact is still unknown, although I am told the enterprise was "official." It's likely that the Church of Scientology would have gotten a cut, too, considering they like to take 10 percent of everything from their celebrity clients.